In which we discuss how incredible hollandaise sauce is

Posted on | Thursday, October 21, 2010 | No Comments

I've tried to make hollandaise sauce twice on my own and both times turned into a gigantic mess. It seems easy enough; beat egg yolks and lemon juice then add butter and whisk whisk whisk. Well, apparently my method makes fancy scrambled eggs.

What's to be done when I can't cook something? Call Katy.

I love my Katy.

Of course if you make hollandaise sauce there has to be a meal that accompanies it. We chose artichokes and blanched green beans. If you are going to ingest half a stick of butter in one meal it's best to counteract such delicious foodiness with something healthy. If only to appease your conscience.

That, and artichokes with hollandaise sauce sounded incredible to both of us. After a quick trip to the grocery store we were ready to begin.

First we needed to prep the artichokes. Since they would take the longest to cook we tossed them into a pot of boiling water while everything else was coming together.

I don't know why, but I find artichokes to be really gorgeous. And delicious.

Next, the dreaded hollandaise sauce. I watched as Katy deftly separated the eggs and added the lemon juice. So far so good. Then it was time to whisk the egg yolks into a mad frenzy.

Whisk whisk whisk.

Do not be fooled by my calm expression. Right around this point my arm began to feel like it was going to fall off. But we soldiered on in the name of French Mother Sauces! These egg yolks would turn into delectable sauce even if my arm went numb making it. Thankfully Katy and I took turns so that both of us would have the use of our appendages. Good plan.

Next, add the butter. The wonderful melted mess of butter. One whole stick of it. Whisk it in gradually to make sure that scrambling does not occur. Keep whisking like a fiend until the mixture thickens. Then do it some more.

See that? Eggs and butter, whipped into delicious submission.

Words cannot express how incredible this sauce is. It's delectable and tangy and perfectly smooth. I would eat it with a spoon and have no shame.

Don't these artichokes look incredible? That's because they were. We devoured them like ravenous beasts.

My darling Hollandaise, you are an incredible sauce. I don't care that I ate half a stick of butter today due to your fattening qualities. You are marvelous and I love you.